Bullying

I'm going to give you a few of my thoughts on bullying and then a couple of links at the end which may help you (scroll down to the bottom of the page if you're in a hurry). First of all, a warning to bullies: perfect lie detectors are on the way, based on FMRI technology which can actually see the brain thinking, so there will soon be nowhere for anyone to hide. Anything you do in the way of bullying will come back to haunt you, so if you've already done a lot of bad things to people, you need to start trying to undo the damage now by apologising to all the people you've hurt and trying to make it up to them in some way.

If you're being bullied, don't keep quiet about it. Technology can be used to collect evidence, so if you don't want to go directly to an adult who might make a mess of things (by telling the bullies that you've told on them and pleading with them to stop), an alternative is to look for an older child of the seriously uncool variety who behaves well and who is highly intelligent - such people may seem uncool, but these are actually the people who become the James Bonds of real life and they'll be absolutely delighted to get the chance to help you. They can help you collect evidence of the bullying so that the bullies can have the book thrown at them. If you can capture actual video of physical assaults, it will be possible to force the police and the courts to get involved. Bullies often grow up to become vicious child abusers of the very worst kind, so it is vital that they should be dealt with by the strong arm of the law at the earliest opportunity rather than just being told off by a namby-pamby teacher - their names need to be put on official registers of violent people who are a danger to society so that they can be monitored properly for the rest of their lives, and that doesn't happen unless the police get involved. Violent adults who abuse children almost always start out as bullies - their addiction to violence develops during childhood and they betray their interest in violence by bullying younger or weaker children (or by ganging up with friends to pick on children of their own size and strength). The sooner they are identified and offered treatment, the less dangerous they will be when they've grown up, so it's vital that their crimes are treated as crimes - unprovoked violence is always a crime and it needs to be treated as such regardless of the age of the people involved in it. Very young children are an exception to this as they can be violent without understanding the harm they're doing, but once they're five years old, almost all of them know exactly what they're doing, and the few who don't can be identified easily enough by their exceptionally low intelligence.

If you're thinking of killing yourself to escape from bullying, you need to think again: you are the kind of person we want to survive the most, so please ask for help as soon as possible. You are not alone - there are many people just like you who are waiting for you to call them so that they can give you the help you need. You are being picked on because you are better than the people who are picking on you - they want you to feel worthless because they know themselves to be worthless and resent the fact that you aren't. Are you ugly? Well, you could have a face like a dogs arse and still be better-looking than any bully. Are you hopeless at sport? However bad you might be at running around and playing silly games with balls, you aren't so useless as anyone who needs to pick on someone else to feel happy. Are you different from other people in some way? Don't like pop music? Gay? Intelligent? Short-sighted? Whatever it is that makes you different, I'd rather be you any day of the week than be a bully, because being a bully is the worst possible thing in the world - most bullies grow up to be child abusers and paedophiles, and there's nothing worse than that. So, whatever else you might think of doing, don't let them off the hook by killing yourself - tell someone what's going on and make sure that the bullies are identified and dealt with properly. It makes no difference what they're doing to bully you or why they're doing it - they are trying to hurt you and they know full well that you don't deserve to be hurt, so they are vicious thugs even if they're only using words to attack you. Collect the evidence. Tell all your friends. If you have no friends, tell all the people who aren't picking on you. Phone a helpline and discuss your situation with an expert - they'll make sure that you are in charge at all times, so they won't act on anything you tell them without your permission. If no one gives you the help you need and you still feel suicidal, think about how the bullies will feel if you kill yourself - they will be absolutely delighted with themselves, while millions of other people will hear about your death and wish they could have helped you (while at the same time wishing that the bullies were dead instead). By bullying you, the bullies have actually made a massive mistake - they have given you the power to bring their world crashing down. Collect evidence and then hit them hard. You are not alone - everyone who matters is on your side.

Have you made a fool of yourself in some way? Is that why you can't tell anyone? Well, whatever you might have done, you haven't made half as much a fool of yourself as any bully has - you simply aren't in their league when it comes to making a fool of yourself! They are more disgusting than the stinkiest thing to have come out of the back end of any dog. They are the ones who should be embarrassed and ashamed. They need to be exposed so that everyone can see exactly what they are, and you have the power to do that to them. You are the one who is in the position of power. You may not realise it, but you have already won because you hold the key to their future. Everytime they hurt you, they put themselves deeper into debt. You own them. You can trigger their downfall at any time. Get advice, collect the evidence, then finish them off.

Have you been badly damaged by events? Have things happened to you that you cannot speak of? I've been there myself. Let me tell you this: people judge you by the things that you do and not by the things that other people do to you. They are the bullies, so they are the ones who have reason to be ashamed. Unless you are a bully yourself, there is nothing you can have done or that can have been done to you which can compare with what they are. Tell someone about what's going on and about how you feel. Every day I wish I could step in to help someone like you, and millions of other people feel the same way. Many of them are available at the end of a phone. Call them. They aren't allowed to identify themselves, but I have worked with many of them and know that they are as keen to help you as I am. They are people just like you, and they're waiting for your call. The world needs you in it, and it seriously doesn't need the bullies, so please ask for help.

Links for bullied children:-

Childline U.K. I don't know how much the site can actually help you, but if you're in Britain you can phone them on 0800 1111 and speak directly to someone who will be keen to help you.

My searches are mainly coming up with U.K. sites because Google knows that's where I'm searching from, so if you live elsewhere in the world you'd do far better to do your own search. Just type "bullying" into Google and have a look through all the top sites on the list it gives you. If you have an equivalent of Childline in your country, please e-mail the details to me so that I can put them in here, because if things are really serious, making a phone call is probably best.

Links for parents:-

bullyonline.org

dnschneider An interesting anti-bullying site written by someone with Tourette's Syndrome. It also has a number of links to other anti-bullying sites.

Feel free to let me know of any top sites on bullying that you come across so that I can add them to this list.